Imagine you’re a teen boy. Imagine that there’s this cute girl in math class that invites you over to her house.
When you arrive you’re taken out back to meet her family. They’re cheerful folk and happy to welcome you. Her dad asks you a few hard questions but you get through them ok. Things are going well.
The man sitting next to you is wearing rough work boots and jeans. He’s got on an old, beat up carhart jacket and has a shaggy beard. His hair is a bit too long and just a little wild under his “Tractor supply” cap. He’s been staring at you for a while with a hard look.
Suddenly, as if making a decision, he leans over, smiles and introduces himself.
“Son, I’m her uncle.”, he says pointing at your date.
“I have eight guns, four acres, two shovels and one very, very good friend.”
You stare at him blankly so he continues, “How those two things are related is really up to you.”
I kid you not.