JINKSTO

I’m on vacation starting tonight after work.  The camper is being loaded as I write this.  Arrangements have been made for the animals that we’re not taking with us and as soon as the last email is sent it’s off we’ll go for a week long whirlwind tour of the southern United States.  North Carolina, South Carolina, Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi and Louisiana.  We’ll pass through them all going and coming. 

I used to get excited a week before a vacation trip back to Louisiana and that excitement would grow until I was finally on the road.  Now it tends to be trepidation more than excitement.  Oh, don’t get me wrong.  I love seeing aunts and uncles and family again and I truly love traveling with my Wife.  She’s grownup enough to help with the driving when needed and likes to get lost sometimes just for fun like I do.  We have a generally great time when we travel.  This time though the excitement of the trip isn’t there.  The “finally getting away from it all” sense that you get on a vacation.

Yes, we’re “finally getting away from it all” but this time the truth is that I don’t really want to get away from it all.  I like “it all” just fine.

The leaves are just coming in on the trees and we’ll miss the long awaited sight of our neighbors fading away into the bright green spring foliage. The little garden that I keep behind the house is all tilled up and ready to plant but the planting will have to wait an extra week until I get back.  We’ll have rains for most of the next 5 days which would have been great to get the garden started.  

In all honesty, I LIKE being a recluse.  I LIKE being secluded and locked away in our little slice of paradise with my one true friend (with no offense intended to my other true friends, of course).   I don’t look forward to 3 days of driving interstates in the rain.  I don’t look forward to taking up residence in someone else’s yard with my big ole camper.  I don’t look forward to dealing with muddy dogs and the transient lifestyle.  Even if it’s only for a week. Even if we truly love the folks we’ll be spending time with and even though we miss them dearly in the time between seeing them.

I really want to spend time with family.  I just wish they’d do it at my house.

So, with several glances over my shoulder we’ll trundle off down the drive tonight and turn right at the Interstate.  We’ll truly enjoy ourselves while gone, we always do.  We’ll get to spend time with family.  A little talking, a little partying, a little celebration.  We will, as they say back home, “pass a good time” until we are back in our little hole in the North Carolina woods. 

So, if I’m visiting you over the next week don’t be offended if you catch me looking just a bit too longingly back towards the East.

Why is THIS my problem?

My lovely wife forwarded this video to me.  Everything’s Fantastic and no one is happy…

I don’t really like Louis C.K.  but this bit is funny.

My wife asked me about this story earlier.  It’s about what the FAA calls a Pilatus PC12 with 17 people on board that crashed in Montana killing all on board. 

I’m not one to armchair quarterback usually but I’m wondering on this one.   A quick look on the net says that the PC-12 is powered by a single turboprop engine. It is certified for single-pilot IFR operations, though operators may choose to utilize a second flight crew member. The PC-12 is offered in standard nine-seat airliner form, in a four-passenger seat/freight Combi version, as a six-seat corporate transport, and as a seven-seat corporate transport with the inclusion of an aft three-seat bench.

So, my question to the more flight savvy folks is this:  If you assume that there were two crew and that there were 9 passenger seats (the max configuration) then you’re up to 11 people on board… where did they have the other six sitting?

I know that the PC12 is often retrofitted for skydiving so maybe it was a skydiving rig and they had them all sitting on the floor but even then if you include six extra folks and skiing gear (the article says they were probably going skiing) you’re still talking about Weight & Balance issues… if not weight, certainly balance… right? Besides, who’d want to fly from Ca to Montana sitting on the floor of a plane?

I dunno, it looked like a professional charter/leasing company that was doing the flying so I’m confident that whatever they did was probably legal… or maybe the model of the plane has been misreported… just struck me as odd.

I wanna be this feller:

Have a listen

Somewhere out in Mud Brook
Out there in the sticks
Lives the last authentic completely unusual man

He’s sick of the dad’gum guv’ment
He’s sick of his neighbors too
He’s sick of me, and he’s damn sure sick of you

He’s got a ratty little dog and a shotgun by the bed
He’s got a bucketload of trouble in his head

Someone from the county
Come by to count his teeth
He said you’ll find’em over there behind the couch

Two ladies from the church
Brought him chicken and a Bible verse
He said “Thank you – now pray for someone worse.”

He’s got a lumpy little dog and a shotgun by the bed
He’s got a bucketload of chaos in his head

He’s fed up with the rednecks
Their bellies and their chew
He’s tired of clipboard hippies telling him what to do

And them mail-order hikers
With kayaks on their cars
Mostly Subarus, tuned to NPR

He’s got a skinny little dog and a shotgun by the bed
He’s got a bucketload of decline in his head

recitation (you betcha!)
I went to see him the other day, he was sittin’ there on his porch, and he said,
“Well I don’t know much…” (and that’s a lie), but he said, “I been studyin’ on it,
and I do know this:

If it beeps, it won’t last
Flash runs outta gas
We all should spend a night on someone’s grave
And if you can’t learn from that
Man, if that don’t snap yer cap
Drink the Kool-Aid, go on, enjoy the ride.

He’s got a happy little dog and a shotgun by the bed
He’s got a teaspoon of hopeful in his head.
Somewhere out in Mud Brook
Out there in the sticks
Lives the last authentic completely unusual man.

Posted without permission but Complete credit and accolades for the song goes to Michael Perry and The Long Beds 

If you haven’t read Mr. Perry do.  For a yankee he’s got good things to say from a completely rural view.

michael_perry-somewhere_out_
[audio:http://www.thelongbeds.com/audio/MICHAEL_PERRY-Somewhere_Out_.m3u]

I’ve mentioned a few times that I’m originally from Louisiana. 

Folks in Louisiana tend to have a good idea about how food works and there are a lot of traditions around it.  One of those traditions is the King Cake which is generally only cooked during Mardi Gras.  I love King Cake but getting them in North Carolina isn’t possible.  I’ve done without them before but Rob came up with the idea of doing a crawfish boil and had live Crawfish shipped in from Louisiana for a get together this weekend (it’s not that expensive really). 

This, of course got me to thinking about King Cakes (and hurricanes) again. So I set out to make an attempt at one.  Since we’ll be taking it to the get together tomorrow I wanted it big enough for everyone to share…  It is. 

It’s not quite clear in this picture but here it is sitting on top of a full size range.  You can see the back two eyes.  The pan it’s sitting on is covered with parchment paper but JUST barely fits inside the oven.

King Cakes are traditionally served between Christmas and Lent.  Serving one after Lent is a frowned upon but since Mrs Jinksto and I will be the only ones from Louisiana there tomorrow we probably won’t get into much trouble over it… shhh…

There’s another bit of Tradition with these that’s fun.  King Cakes have a small plastic baby baked into them.  I’m told that “half a pecan” can be used instead but, really, I’ve never heard of that and assume it’s a small bit of heresy introduced by political correctorites who don’t like the idea of baking a baby.  Anyway, the idea is that the person that gets the slice with the “prize” gets treated like a king for the rest of the day (with a companion set of traditions that define what that means) and has to spring for the Party the next year.  As with most traditions most people only follow parts of it… usually the part that involves not treating someone else like a king and ensuring that he unloads the cash the following year. 

As a final bit of departure, this cake doesn’t have a baby in it (or a pecan for that matter) but, honestly, have you ever tried to find a plastic baby suitable for baking into a cake in North Carolina?  No? Well, don’t bother… there aint one and I am NOT going around to craft stores asking if they have a baby that I can bake into a cake.  If I were in Louisiana it’d be a safe and sane thing to do.  Since I’m not, it’d probably get me arrested.

King Cakes come in one of two varieties usually… though here again, foodies have corrupted it and bastardized them until you can get everything form  a peach King Cake up to and including a Vegan version… and you thought my little bits of heresy were bad?!  

The two primary “versions” of a King Cake are filled and unfilled.  An unfilled King cake is a bit like a great big cinnamon roll and a filled King Cake is a lot like a great big cheese danish.  I love Cream Cheese… and cheese danishes so I’ll leave it to you to figure out which I made.

Now if I can just find my recipe for Hurricanes we’ll “Let The Good Times Roll!”

Having thought about writing my congressional representatives lately I realized that few of us really even know where to send the mail.  When I went to look it up I discovered an amazing amount of (unintentional, I think) misdirection and confusion.  It was so confusing, in fact, that I thought it might be useful to build a list for others.

Also, in researching this I came a across a few tips for writing your congressman.  Here’s a quick summary:

• Keep it to one page.  These folks get a ton of mail and aren’t likely to read or pay attention to anything more than that.
• Be brief.  Include two paragraphs.
• In the first paragraph, state who you are, what you’re concerned about and what you think should be done (or not done) about it. Don’t include long arguments or detailed discussion here.  That’s what the second paragraph is for.
• In the second paragraphs provide any arguments or reasoning for your position.
• After the second paragraph include your mailing address.  This is IMPORTANT.  If a representative can’t tell that the letter is from someone in their district they will, in most cases, completely ignore your letter.  Add your mailing address or your home address if they’re different.  They want to know that you’re in the right district.
• Again, be as brief and detailed as possible and don’t use profanity.  Though, I agree, many of them deserve it doing so will just get your letter immediately discarded. 
• In summary: Be polite, be brief but detailed and include your contact information.

Here are the addresses for the NC representatives and a link to figure out your NC district (if you find errors here please let me know at jinksto@gmail.com and I’ll do what I can to correct them):

 Senators
The Honorable Richard Burr
United States Senate
217 Russell Senate Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20510-3301

The Honorable Kay Hagan
United States Senate
DB-40A Dirksen Senate Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20510-3306

Representatives
Not sure which district you’re in? Check here!

District 1
The Honorable G. K. Butterfield, Jr.
United States House of Representatives
413 Cannon House Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20515-3301

District 2
The Honorable Bobby Etheridge
United States House of Representatives
1533 Longworth House Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20515-3302

District 3
The Honorable Walter B. Jones, Jr.
United States House of Representatives
2333 Rayburn House Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20515-3303

District 4
The Honorable David E. Price
United States House of Representatives
2162 Rayburn House Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20515-3304

District 5
The Honorable Virginia Foxx
United States House of Representatives
1230 Longworth House Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20515-3305

District 6
The Honorable Howard Coble
United States House of Representatives
2468 Rayburn House Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20515-3306

District 7
The Honorable Mike McIntyre
United States House of Representatives
2437 Rayburn House Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20515-3307

District 8
The Honorable Larry Kissell
United States House of Representatives
512 Cannon House Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20515-3308

District 9
The Honorable Sue Myrick
United States House of Representatives
230 Cannon House Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20515-3309

District 10
The Honorable Patrick McHenry
United States House of Representatives
224 Cannon House Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20515-3310

District 11
The Honorable Heath Shuler
United States House of Representatives
422 Cannon House Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20515-3311

District 12
The Honorable Melvin L. Watt
United States House of Representatives
2304 Rayburn House Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20515-3312

District 13
The Honorable Brad Miller
United States House of Representatives
1127 Longworth House Office Building
Washington, D.C. 20515-3313

A quick short story because I happen to be thinking of it.

I was boarding an international flight to London one evening a few years ago.  The boarding agent called for first class tickets and those of us who had the special super magic “I fly too much” cards.    They were usually pretty good about making sure that people board with the correct group but on this occasion she missed a couple of crackpots. 

One of the gentlemen about four or five people in front of me stopped in the Business Class section and tossed his full size bag into the overhead bin, grinned at his buddy and said, “I always do that… that way I don’t have to carry the thing all the way to the back.”  He then proceeded to head off to Coach class in the rear of the plane.  A few people mumbled but no one actually said anything to the guy.

As I got to my seat I realized that his bag was actually over my seat.  I’ll admit to being a little frustrated.  I don’t like leaving my wife for two weeks at a time and I really don’t like people that try to cram a full sized bag into overhead bins because they can’t wait 10 minutes at the baggage claim…  especially MY overhead bin.

After thinking about it for a bit, I pulled his bag down and set it in front of my seat.  As the other passengers got on the overhead bins became completely filled with people stuffing bits into every available nook.  Shortly, a very nice flight attendant came by, noticed the bag and said sweetly, ” Oh, no!  There’s no more room for your bag hun?  Would you like for me to gate check that for you?”

“No, I just…” I started to explain and then paused for a second before continuing, “Would you mind much?  I hate to be any trouble.”

“Of course not.  Here, let me get that and I’ll be right back with your claim check” she said as she snatched the bag up and headed for the door. 

A few minutes later she was back with a claim check which I calmly tucked into the seat back pocket as a looked around to see if anyone had noticed.  One lady, sitting two rows back gave me a big grin and a thumbs up but that was it.

In London, I got off with the rest of business class but would have loved to see that guys face when he found his bag gone.

Most hunters have at one time or another encountered a ghost deer.  Sometimes you’re just sitting there and hear something walking through the dead, dry leaves and can’t see anything moving.  Other times you’ll see a deer and it’ll suddenly fade from sight.  No noise, no movement.  Just gone.  Sometimes you’ll shoot and whatever you were shooting at will cease to exist.  

Bigftoot? Yeti?  Myth’s!  The ghost deer though…  that sucker exists right in my front yard and it can run right through trees.

I really try to keep this fresh and not post things already posted by others.  Given my reading list that’s pretty hard to do sometimes.  Still, when I saw this over at PitchPull I HAD to put it on my own site.  So, with nods to greybeard for pointing it out, have a look…